Holiday blues: Fil-Am widow thankful for programs that help ease sadness

Deacon Tony and Rosie Paulino were inseparable until his passing last year. CONTRIBUTED

SOUTH SAN FRANCISCO, Calif. – Next April will mark the second death anniversary of Antonio Paulino, known as “Deacon Tony” in the Archdiocese of San Francisco where he ministered for nearly 40 years.

Congregants of St. Andrew Catholic Church in Daly City and earlier of Good Shepherd in Pacifica – the most recent parishes where the former administrative officer of the Philippine Consulate General in San Francisco had served – remember Deacon Tony for his inspiring homilies and unquestionable devotion to his faith.

When he lost his fight to complications from diabetes in the spring of 2023, he left behind a family for whom he was spiritual, moral and social guide and protector.

“I think of him every waking moment,” his widow Rosie Robles Paulino told Inquirer.net USA. “But I know he is one with the Lord, where there is no more pain or suffering.”

The holiday season brings cheer to many but also tends to sadden people coping with the loss of a loved one, like Rosie, her widower son Ronald, Ronald’s children Valerie and Arron and Arron’s wife  Kim.  Their South San Francisco home can be a bit too quiet without the patriarch‘s solemn grace before every meal, they say, after he has prepared sushi or adobo sa gata, his specialties.

Labor of Love

For those in the Paulinos’ shoes, community-based organizations are collaborating with public entities to brighten the coming days for individuals and families with ache in their hearts.

Here in South San Francisco, for one, a group called “Friends of Old Town,” has been distributing turkey and Thanksgiving meal boxes to the tight-knit neighborhood for the past six years.  Last week they gave away 190 turkeys, said Hermes Monzon, coordinator of the Saturday event that drew lines of folks of every generation and background.

The Turkey drive is a Friends of Old Town joint gift to the community with Sociedad Mutualista Mexicana de Morelo, Painters and Drywall Finishers Local 913, Carpet, Linoleum and Soft Tile Workers Local 12 and South San Francisco Scavenger that brought back memories to David Canepa, vice president of the San Mateo County Board of Supervisors.

Though the area is a few blocks out of his jurisdiction, Canepa partnered on the endeavor for a deeply personal reason.

“This event means so much to me because Old Town South San Francisco holds a special place in my heart,” he warmed up the crowd.  “It’s where my grandmother, Liliana Torres, grew up. This community is rich in history, full of warmth and embodies the true spirit of generosity.”

Soon as 209 Miller Street between Linden and Cypress opened its doors at 10 a,m. on Nov. 22, smiling faces streamed with recipients, benefactors and supporters greeting each other.

“Come, let’s have a picture together.  I want to show this to my mother who’s from Pulilan (Bulacan, Philippines),” Athena Castro Marchisheck approached a Filipino American attendee.  As did Yasmil Rodriguez, another community advocate reaching out to a potential ally.

Canepa brought along his constant escort, his 7-year-old son Piero, to walk in his shoes growing up with parents in public service.

“Old Town is one of South San Francisco’s oldest and most vibrant neighborhoods and the people who live here are some of the most welcoming and gracious,” Canepa said, pointing to a significant impact of the effort.

“But many in this working-class community are older adults, some isolated and lonely, and others who are food insecure. This longstanding free turkey giveaway is an expression of gratitude and a way to help people connect at a time when some people might be feeling depressed and have the holiday blues.”

He commended the tireless Monzon, Ana Zaragoza, Brittany Burgo and Dana Abarca of Friends of Old Town, Anthony Nuanes of Local 12, Joe Sanders of Local 913, Max Snelling of Local 718, Desiree Green of San Mateo Labor Council, Carlos Martinez of IUPAT and Oscar Gamez and Jesus Galvan of Morelos for hosting what is the unofficial opening of the holidays in the “Industrial City,” the nickname South San Francisco earned for its strong support for labor.  And more.

“The turkey drive isn’t just about food; it’s about connection,” said the District 5 supervisor representing Daly City, Colma, Brisbane, parts of San Bruno and South San Francisco, municipalities with high concentrations of Filipinos, Asians and Latinos.  “It’s a way to bring hope to those feeling isolated, lift up neighbors facing food insecurity and spread joy during the holiday season.”

Connecting communities

Some of the event participants were able to pick up their turkey as members of Got Wheels!, the affordable transportation program run by Peninsula Family Service funded by San Mateo County and championed by Canepa through his Loneliness to Light initiative.

SSF resident and new Got Wheels! member Wing Wong was excited to inaugurate his program membership card by arriving at the Los Morelos distribution site in a Serra Yellow Cab, the transportation program partner provider.

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“This allows me to run errands even on days when I don’t feel safe driving because of my vision issue,” he said as he collected his turkey the morning when the sun briefly shone between successive storms.

Rosie Paulino, on the other hand, was glad the turkey giveaway took place on the weekend when son Ronald was free to drive her around.  Otherwise she would have no second thoughts about using her discounted taxi rides, she said.

“I never learned to drive because my husband and I carpooled when we were both working,” said the former See’s Candy employee who has been volunteering as lector and Eucharistic minister and pianist before and now in retirement.

As a widow in her 80s, Paulino counts on the kindness of family and friends in the absence of her husband of 60 years.

“There isn’t a time when I don’t miss him, but knowing there are many who care to ease my loneliness – people close to me and perfect strangers alike – help me make it through each day.  I’m beyond grateful to them,” she expressed a sentiment shared by about 15 percent of the county population known as Baby Boomers, people born between 1946 and 1964.

In the beginning of the 21st Century, the US Census found that every day from 2011 to 2029, 10,000 individuals in this country would be turning 65 years old.  The results prompted public and private service organizations to build strategies and capacity to respond appropriately and effectively.

Lack of transportation and nutrition affects physical health, discouraging older adults from  making their doctor’s appointments or picking up medications.  Lack of access to resources can lead to poor mental health, as absence of socialization and social connections often results in depression and isolation, aging and adult service agencies concur.

Access to such resources can be life-saving to a multitude, hence the collaboration of labor leaders and residents of South San Francisco to work toward ensuring no one is left in want, particularly during the season of comfort and joy.