Men Are Using AI Bots To Attract Women On Dating Apps

Reports of men using AI chatbots to win dates on dating apps have been making the rounds on social media. 

Kristen Ruby, a public relations executive from Westchester County, explained the phenomenon to the news outlet after a friend used AI to text her.

Also, a spokesperson for CupidBot told the publication one of its engineers used software to earn 13 dates in one month.

How do men use AI to game dating apps?

Photo Credit: www.aiplusinfo.com

Kristen Ruby recently received a text message from a man she’s known for roughly two years, but it didn’t sound like him. The message read in part:

“I was surprised and hurt to hear you refer to me as a narcissist … I would appreciate it if you could share with me what behaviors or actions you have observed that led you to that conclusion.”

Later, she discovered that the guy used an AI bot to compose that text. 

“What was so scary about it was that the message that has [emotion] is the one that’s going to be more convincing or compelling to a woman on the other end of it,” Ruby told The Post.

Meanwhile, some men are delegating more online dating tasks to AI chatbots, luring unsuspecting women. 

A recent episode of “South Park,” co-written by ChatGPT, depicted the main characters using the critically-acclaimed app to communicate with their girlfriends.

A Reddit thread debated the ethics of men using AI personas to score dates. One of the now-deleted posts said:

“Dating apps have always favored women, so I decided to tip the scales … I fought back by building an AI-powered bot that could do the swiping and chatting for me.”

In response, other Redditors refused the notion. One of them wrote, “People, potential dating partners or not, are not statistics.”

“They’re very real people, who I assume are not aware they are actually talking to a robot.” Meanwhile, some doubted the AI dating program was real.

Yet, a spokesperson for CupidBot told The New York Post one of its engineers posted the Reddit thread. The representative added the software earned the man 13 dates in one month.

What are the potential impacts of AI on dating?

What happens when you start dating an AI chatbot?

In this new essay on @HuffPost Personal, a therapist writes about how she built a bot boyfriend — and purposefully tried to ruin their relationship for research's sake — but things didn't go as plannedhttps://t.co/eloCpbRIPE

— Noah Michelson (@noahmichelson) March 6, 2023

The AI tool promised users will “get several dates a week by doing absolutely nothing” for $15. It is undergoing closed beta testing, so the cost may increase in the final launch.

CupidBot claimed data suggested the initial exchanges between folks on dating apps aren’t usually memorable and don’t impact the success of in-person dates.

“The bot does not reveal itself. However, we do strongly advise our users to tell the women once they’ve gotten their contact information,” the company told customers.

Also, its spokesperson insisted CupidBot’s goal is to provide more high-quality matches in the world of online dating.

“Our goal is not to saturate [dating apps] with artificial conversations, and it’s certainly not to objectify women.”

“But rather to force dating apps to reevaluate how they operate and to facilitate the dating process for some people in the meantime.

However, women like Ruby worried that AI dating apps could create a false sense of connection. 

“There are [so many] dangers of becoming emotionally attached to a person who is actually a bot,” she said.

Ruby warned about the possibility of falling for computer-generated words or “feelings” that the man cannot or would not replicate in real life. 

“The scariest part is because it’s such a new trend. A lot of women don’t even know that their private messages are being copied and pasted into an AI system without their consent.”

“Over time, that information can be used to create a psychological profile [of her],” Ruby added.