Loida Nicolas Lewis spills her life’s highs and lows in new book
Loida Nicolas Lewis (left) with TV host Luisa Marshall in Vancouver, BC. CONTRIBUTED
NEW YORK—Philanthropist and civic leader Loida Nicolas Lewis, considered one of America’s most influential Democratic leaders and among the most admired in the Asian community, talks about life’s highs and lows in her memoir Why Should Guys Have All the Fun? The interesting title references the 1995 bestseller of her late husband, Reginald Lewis, the first African American to have built a billion-dollar company in his time.
“I should tell people my life story,” Loida Lewis told INQUIRER.net, recalling how she had traveled the country over the past 25 years to promote her late husband’s book, Why Should White Guys Have All the Fun?, which was published almost three years after the Wall Street lawyer succumbed to brain cancer in January 1993.
“Many people have come to me, especially people of color – Black, Latino and even Filipino. They read the book and they changed their career, they read the book and they became an entrepreneur, they read the book and they started to dream big,” she said.
This time, Loida Lewis is on a tour for her own book. Since Why Should Guys Have All the Fun? was published March 28, she has been to the West Coast where notably, San Diego County officials declared April 15 Loida Nicolas Lewis Day.
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On a visit to Alameda, Calif., she met up with California Attorney General Rob Bonta and together with other Filipino American community leaders, discussed a possible violation of Federal Securities laws by Chevron Corporation. The company had sold its interests in the Philippines’ Malampaya gas fields to a known crony of former Philippine President Rodrigo Duterte, allegedly for a “small fraction of its value”. Loida Lewis is a Chevron shareholder and national chair of advocacy group U.S. Filipinos for Good Governance.
Hope, faith and love are predominant themes in Why Should Guys Have All the Fun? It is where Loida Lewis bares the failures that helped shape her success story.
“I didn’t just have all those achievements. I have had failures and it’s stated in my book. I went into real estate and went into bankruptcy. After being so successful as a CEO, I tried to buy companies too. And failed. So my book tells all the highs and also the lows,” Loida Lewis said.
She credits an immense faith in God for her stability despite such setbacks as losing a husband when he was barely 50 years old or having to fight discrimination during her time at the Immigration and Naturalization Service, predecessor of the Department of Homeland Security.
“For those people who will read the book, you will see that my belief in the loving God is like a running strain in my life. So ups and downs, light and darkness, sadness and joy and all throughout, I knew God protects me and God Is my rock and my salvation,” Loida Lewis said.
It was the Bible verse about unconditional love that allowed her to overcome intense jealousy when on an intimate dinner, Mr. Lewis told her about a date he had had with an attractive single Black woman.
Book launch with community leaders in Los Angeles and San Diego. CONTRIBUTED
“Oh my God, I was so jealous! So that was so difficult. How do you deal with that? You know, because in my mind, they were sleeping together. And that’s when my own faith of what true love is—that love is patient, am I patient? Love is kind, am I kind? Love is not self-seeking, am I self-seeking? Love does not keep a record of wrong, do I keep a record of wrongs? Love never ends, meaning to say unconditional love. And so, once I integrated that into my being, into my consciousness, then he can do no wrong. He slept with another woman, so what? He loves me and I love him. So those are some of the things that I was able to hurdle,” Loida Lewis said most candidly.
Love is the very basic element of a successful marriage, she noted. And a woman could take the lead in a marriage, rather than the man. It all depends on how the couple would want to go about it, as long as “you decide who will be the CEO”.
In her own marriage to Reginald Lewis, despite her avowed “intense and very dominant” persona, Loida Lewis became comfortable being the supportive wife. After all, Mr. Lewis was more intense, more dominant, a triple A-type personality, and more ambitious than her.
“When I found somebody, he became the head of the family. That’s how I managed it. I became the role that would complement him. He’s going to go up to the stars, I’m just holding on to him. And so take care of the house, take care of the children, take care of him. You know, that’s how you may have a successful marriage. The very basic element is love: that you love him and he loves you. If that is there, don’t sweat the small stuff,” Loida Lewis said.
