Raising others’ kids is mothering too

Chery Avila with “her kids.” CONTRIBUTED

Every day, she gathers her eight children. They play, sing, dance, do arts, eat, and later on take a nap. If the weather permits, they go out and bask in the sun until another bad weather takes them back inside.

In the evening, the kids say goodbye but not without crying because one or two want to stay a little longer. But Mommy won’t give in. Anyway, they will all come back the next day. Only two kids remain — Russel, 5, and Austin, 4, Chery Avila-Roy’s own sons.

Chery, 45, of Alberta, Canada, has been a childcare/day-home provider since 2015. Being an entrepreneur is not new to her. In the Philippines, she owned tiangge at Market! Market Mall! in Manila before emigrating to Canada.

“I really wanted to take care of my own children. But I never thought that I could take care of a lot of kids,” Chery laughs.

If you possess passion, patience, and a high tolerance for children, like Chery you could be a childcare/day-home provider too.

Life-changing decisions

Chery and Farrell Roy, a Canadian met in an online dating site in March 2010. After a month, Farrell proposed marriage and she accepted. They began communicating constantly, even eating together in different time zones.

In January 2011, Farrell flew to Manila to marry Chery in a Catholic wedding ceremony in Pasay City. After processing her documents, Chery waited for five months to get a schedule for an interview at the Canadian Embassy.

Chery Avila-Roy and her family. CONTRIBUTED

“During the interview, the visa officer asked me something about my husband, how well I know him etc., etc. Another question was, why did you choose to marry a foreigner? I said I want to have blue-eyed children,” Chery laughs.

Instead of having blue-eyed babies, the Roy siblings are brown-eyed, Chery says. After nine months of marriage, Chery had to leave her old life. She sold her shop at Market Market Mall. As an entrepreneur used to her own schedule and living independently, Chery had to face another life in a foreign country living with a husband she hardly knew.

A new beginning

Chery arrived at Calgary Airport on September 21, 2011 as summer was changing to autumn. Farrell was waiting and ready to begin a new life with her.

After a month, Chery received her Social Insurance Number (SIN), a document she needed to get a job. She was hired as an advertising sales and customer service representative in a publishing company.

After ten months, Chery gave birth. She filed for a mandatory maternity leave, which is one year. The next year, she gave birth again to their youngest. After her one-year maternity leave Chery decided to resign from her job to become a “full-time” mother.

Day-home and childcare business

Childcare in Canada is expensive. In 2017, the cost of infant care could run up to $1,758 a month in Toronto for each child depending on age, according to the Canadian Center for Policy Alternatives (CCPA). Slots for childcare are also difficult to find due to lack of licensed childcare and daycare centers. Parents with a toddler can spend up to $25,000 a year — that is if they are lucky enough to get a slot.

Sending two toddlers to childcare would be a burden to the Roy couple. Chery decided to become a full-time mother and to raise her boys the “Filipino way.” Moreover, it was an opportunity to practice her entrepreneurial skills.

The children doing simple tasks. CONTRIBUTED

There are two different kinds of childcare facilities in Canada. A daycare program is facility-based and accepts more than 20 children. Meanwhile, an approved day home or private day home is regulated or monitored by the government and are only allowed to accept six children including the caregiver’s own.

Chery says that a child-care provider is not a low-skilled work. The applicant must undergo a series of training on childcare first aid and early childhood education, which is continuous. The police also monitor childcare facilities to ensure that the caregivers are taking care of the children.

Chery takes care of eight children, with ages 1 to 5 years, including her two sons. She charges $800 a month per child for a nine-hour stay.

“Taking care of eight children is not an easy thing to do, and yes, there are so many disgusting moments, frustrating moments, like a four-year-old who refuses to go to the toilet,” Chery says.

Mothering

In raising her two sons, Chery imparts the values of independence, obedience, sharing, and resilience. Her sons also know how to do “mano” or kissing the elders’ hand. She also talks to them in Tagalog as much as possible.

Since she opened the day-home, Chery has become ‘Mommy’ to all the children under her care.

“I had one Filipino client that only lasted only two months. The child had a hard time adjusting being away from parents that he developed a severe separation anxiety. Crying too much can cause a hernia,” Chery recalls. The parents decided to pull out the kid and adjusted their work schedules.

Chery explains that a mother and a day-home provider are similar in many ways. It requires not only taking care of the kids and feeding them, but also encouraging and supporting them to develop skills, talents, and self-confidence through various activities like arts, free play, and simple tasks like going to the toilet or eating independently.

“It takes a lot of patience, energy, ability to do multi-tasking. It’s intellectual as well since we are also early childhood educators. The rewarding part of having a day-home business is the experience of being with my kids and being part of the early development of the children under my care.”